An Open Letter To Kathleen Parker

Kathleen -

I thought in my last e-mail to you that I had made it clear that the jig was up with your coy representations that you are in fact a Republican. You're not, and it's disingenuous of you to suggest otherwise. By the way, your martyr complex is showing a bit, what with your references to "bathing in holy water" and a "short break as writer ties blindfold and smokes her last cigarette". While the overall effect may be to imply some continued connection or loyalty to the Republican party, and that you will be excised from same for your apostasy, it's clear you're not, and it's clear they won't. You can't excise that which was never part of you in the first place.

Plus, you're mixing your metaphors. If you were hell bound on going with the "bathing in holy water" line, I think Crucifixion would have been a much more appropriate theme than the "blindfold and cigarette" deal, what with your riff being about over-reacting Christians and all. There was a neat tie-in with The Pharisees and The Religious Right that you totally overlooked.

As to the niche you're trying to carve out for yourself, Chris Buckley beat you to the punch, effectively claiming the role that Kevin Phillips, David Gergen and a handful of others have performed so admirably these past 25 years as the Conservatives That The Media Loves To Quote when they want to flog us with one of our own. Interesting to note that there is no such person on the Liberal side, as it is anathema for The Media to flog Democrats; it would be like flogging oneself.

I believe your mistake in throwing Republicans under the bus was your incremental approach. Don't get me wrong, I see where you were going: you thought that a gradual betrayal of your party - if in fact you ever belonged - would allow you to put forward a narrative of "conversion", thus keeping your credibility intact, and establishing yourself as the Go-To Gal for Media Republican haters in the future. Unfortunately, Chris Buckley upstaged you. His departure was much more dramatic, positively David Brockish, what with rending his loincloth in the public square, theatrically throwing the back of his hand against his forehead and loudly declaiming to any and all that he had seen the error of his ways, was picking up his ball in a huff, and running straight into the warm embrace of the Leftwing blogosphere.

Of course, it's not apparent that you or Buckley had quite the identity crisis during your brief embracement of Conservatism that Brock did, but what the hey. You all at least have in common that you did it for practical reasons, as is now becoming so abundantly clear.

Sorry to say, you're sounding increasingly like Maureen Dowd. Now, that's not entirely bad, except that she is a credentialed Liberal and you're not. Dowd is entertaining, albeit that her looks are going (so important a part of her media persona) and they did add a little sauce to the stew, so to speak. That said, to compete in the already overcrowded Republican-bashing segment, your choices are to either out-Dowd Dowd in your rhetoric, or come up with something entirely new. I wish you the best of luck in your endeavors.

On your thesis re: the Religious Right being the root of all Republican failure this past election cycle, thanks for the Belly Laughs, but between you and me, you are kidding, right?

Pete Smith
13507 King Circle Dr.
Cypress, TX 77429
281-955-8126
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Giving Up on God

By Kathleen ParkerWednesday, November 19, 2008; 12:00 AM

As Republicans sort out the reasons for their defeat, they likely will overlook or dismiss the gorilla in the pulpit.
Three little letters, great big problem: G-O-D.
I'm bathing in holy water as I type.
To be more specific, the evangelical, right-wing, oogedy-boogedy branch of the GOP is what ails the erstwhile conservative party and will continue to afflict and marginalize its constituents if reckoning doesn't soon cometh.
Simply put: Armband religion is killing the Republican Party. And, the truth -- as long as we're setting ourselves free -- is that if one were to eavesdrop on private conversations among the party intelligentsia, one would hear precisely that.
The choir has become absurdly off-key, and many Republicans know it.
But they need those votes!
So it has been for the Grand Old Party since the 1980s or so, as it has become increasingly beholden to an element that used to be relegated to wooden crates on street corners.
Short break as writer ties blindfold and smokes her last cigarette.
Which is to say, the GOP has surrendered its high ground to its lowest brows. In the process, the party has alienated its non-base constituents, including other people of faith (those who prefer a more private approach to worship), as well as secularists and conservative-leaning Democrats who otherwise might be tempted to cross the aisle.
Here's the deal, 'pubbies: Howard Dean was right.
It isn't that culture doesn't matter. It does. But preaching to the choir produces no converts. And shifting demographics suggest that the Republican Party -- and conservatism with it -- eventually will die out unless religion is returned to the privacy of one's heart where it belongs.
Religious conservatives become defensive at any suggestion that they've had something to do with the GOP's erosion. And, though the recent Democratic sweep can be attributed in large part to a referendum on Bush and the failing economy, three long-term trends identified by Emory University's Alan Abramowitz have been devastating to the Republican Party: increasing racial diversity, declining marriage rates and changes in religious beliefs.
Suffice it to say, the Republican Party is largely comprised of white, married Christians. Anyone watching the two conventions last summer can't have missed the stark differences: One party was brimming with energy, youth and diversity; the other felt like an annual Depends sales meeting.
With the exception of Miss Alaska, of course.
Even Sarah Palin has blamed Bush policies for the GOP loss. She's not entirely wrong, but she's also part of the problem. Her recent conjecture about whether to run for president in 2012 (does anyone really doubt she will?) speaks for itself:
"I'm like, okay, God, if there is an open door for me somewhere, this is what I always pray, I'm like, don't let me miss the open door. Show me where the open door is.... And if there is an open door in (20)12 or four years later, and if it's something that is going to be good for my family, for my state, for my nation, an opportunity for me, then I'll plow through that door."
Let's do pray that God shows Alaska's governor the door.
Meanwhile, it isn't necessary to evict the Creator from the public square, surrender Judeo-Christian values or diminish the value of faith in America. Belief in something greater than oneself has much to recommend it, including most of the world's architectural treasures, our universities and even our founding documents.
But, like it or not, we are a diverse nation, no longer predominantly white and Christian. The change Barack Obama promised has already occurred, which is why he won.
Among Jewish voters, 78 percent went for Obama. Sixty-six percent of under-30 voters did likewise. Forty-five percent of voters ages 18-29 are Democrats compared to just 26 percent Republican; in 2000, party affiliation was split almost evenly.
The young will get older, of course. Most eventually will marry, and some will become their parents. But nonwhites won't get whiter. And the nonreligious won't get religion through external conversion. It doesn't work that way.
Given those facts, the future of the GOP looks dim and dimmer if it stays the present course. Either the Republican Party needs a new base -- or the nation may need a new party.
Kathleen Parker's e-mail address is kparker@kparker.com.