Don't You Mess With My GIQ, Wendy Davis

Regarding "Controversy may be brewing over big beer" (Monday page B2) Democratic gubernatorial candidate and current state senator Wendy Davis and her ilk perpetuate several stereotypes and misconceptions in their efforts to stigmatize the sale and consumption of the 40 oz. bottles of "big beers" described in the article. 

 First off, it's important to know that none of them are beer.  They are all a tasty variant known as Malt Liquor, generally 6 to 7% alcohol content.  Second, while the packaging and potency may feed into Davis' narrative of hooch-swilling bums on street corners, nothing could be further from the truth.  As a malt liquor consumer of some 40 years, I can tell you that people who enjoy "GIQs" are subtle drinkers with a refined palate.  Third, there's a reason the bottle has a cap: nobody consumes a GIQ at one sitting.  Like a good bottle of wine, it is served in moderate quantities and savored, the robust bouquet rolled over the tongue, as one would a fine Shiraz or Cabernet.

 

Fourth, my early appreciation of Malt Liquor has not only improved my cultural IQ, it has made me smarter as well.  I recall with fondness the second or third time I had a bottle of malt liquor, sipping it in the company of a newspaper vendor at the corner of Woodward and Seven Mile in Detroit back in the early 70s.  I told my companion I was curious why the bottles were packaged at 40 ounces.  Titus informed me that 40 fluid ounces was known as the Imperial Quart, that the 40 oz. measure was established back in the days of medieval kings of England, and that the term GIQ - "Government Imperial Quart" - was coined by the British department of systems of measurement early in the 19th century.  

Try finding all that on the Internet in one place.  Titus was the Sage of Seven Mile.

 

Finally, I advise Ms Davis to contemplate Malt Liquor's almost mystical versatility: you can sip it like champagne, you can drink it like a beer, and it works great as a mixer.  Combined with orange juice, it produces a refreshing year round drink called the Brass Monkey that will make you swear off Mimosas forever, and at a fraction of the cost.  In fact, there is a running club of the same name up in The Woodlands that took their name from the drink.  They count several Marathoners in their ranks, and run brutal seven to ten mile cross country runs knowing that a tasty blend of Malt Liquor and OJ is waiting at the end to slake their thirst and restore their good health.  Don't take my word for it though - you can look them up.

 

In conclusion, if Wendy Davis is going to crack down on the sale of Malt Liquor, she should know that she's messing not only with discriminating consumers, but centuries of tradition as well.  She should also be prepared to  crack down on two liter bottles of wine - greater in volume and with much higher alcohol content - regardless of how many suburban housewives she ticks off.  Malt Liquor drinkers deserve at least the same benefit of the doubt as the voting bloc she hopes will sweep her into the governor's chair.

 

Pete Smith

Houston, TX